How to find new friends when you are older

I visited a wedding from friends this weekend. It was so wonderful and full of love and joy and we all celebrated until sunset.

There were a couple friendly and open women that I met and had long conversations with.

After a while I thought: As older as I get, it becomes harder for to build new and long friendships🧐

Today, I want to give you some tips on how you still can  building long lasting friendships when you are older.


1. Be as honest as possible

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Photo by Pixabay on

People like honesty. In my past, I was an extremely secretive person because I didn´t like judgement but nowadays I don´t give a fart what other people would think of me. It gave me so much freedom. I talk alot about family, work, friends and past relationship (everything in context). What I noticed afterwards, is that people begin to open extremely towards me and they start talking about things they probably would not have. I learned this from a good friend of mine. She met me and she start telling me intimate things. She really impressed me. Very important is to have limits about you talk about and what not, because not everybody has the best interest for you.🙄



2. Dont talk about problematic topics

photography of a persons hand with stop signage
Photo by Joël Super on

I often notice the mistake that people start highly explosive topics like racism, religion, politics and money, knowing that this topics are highly attached to emotions. I never talk about this topics if I meet someone new, because I want to create a positive environment and I want that the other person feel as comfortable as possible. Talk about light things like the venue, from where you know this person e.g

4. Touch

two women with man hugging by the sea
Photo by nappy on

I love touching people! Haha it sounds strange but if you use physical contact, people will automatically feel more attached to you. Don’t do it too often and know your limits. I would not touch my boss , because that is inappropriate (married, work relationship) Be aware that some people hate to be touched from stangers. So observe the person and react to that.

5. Ask questions

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Photo by Pixabay on

People love talkig about themselves. Therefore, you can take it for your advantage and ask alot of question. But don’t make the mistake and keep asking question like it is an interrogation or interview. 🧐When you see similarities, you can talk about a story that was similar to the story the person were telling you.

6. Try to keep in touch

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Photo by John-Mark Smith on

This is by far the hardest part off all. Especially when you are older than 18, you normaly have alot of different responsibilities and less time for friends. Maybe you already have children and you work alot. This should not be an excuse! Life is so precious and we should stay open for new relationships as much as possible. Ask the other person when they have time. Give them dates to choose and send here and now things that remind you of them. That is really thoughtful and sweet!😊




Do you have this problem to find new friends.







8 Gedanken zu „How to find new friends when you are older

  1. Hey Bella,
    oh yeah that is so true!
    I find it hard myself but I try to challenge myself and attend local events in my city by my own. AND I signed up to a yoga course. I am optimistic to meet new people, but I try to leave the pressure out.

    Have a nice day! Jenny😊

    Gefällt 1 Person

  2. Jenny, thank you for sharing this. I’m 25 and I notice it’s become difficult to make new friends. Especially keeping in touch. People exchange Instagram info and that’s typically not my go-to to engage with people. What do you recommend with that?

    Gefällt 1 Person

  3. Hi Jenny,

    I’ve the same problem, when you’re going to be older you change your words and feelings. If I don’t like someone I don’t try to speak with the guy, when I was 18 I spoke with everybody.

    Gefällt 1 Person

  4. Thank you Rosaliene for the constructive feedback! You are totally right. Germans are very reserved and I normaly wait for that but if I am a very open person and when I talk I gesture alot😆 But of course you have to be careful.
    Much love,

    Gefällt 1 Person

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